1) Take care of all people and living things in our environment, and 2) Take care of all of the material things in our environment. Montessori Discipline 101. A pillar of the Montessori discipline philosophy is learning your own triggers to avoid feeling stressed or overwhelmed. If that's the definition of discipline, as Montessorians we want nothing to do with it! Talk with them about how it affects them and their community through conversations and lessons about what acceptable social behavior is and what behaviors are not acceptable. Discuss this in a calm manner. This is often the stage at which most parents and educators stop developing discipline in children because their only goal is obedience to authority. Big reactions like this, however, do more harm than good. Visitors commonly issue such comments as, Ive heard Montessori is too free and chaotic or Ive heard Montessori is too structured. It does not seem possible that these two extreme opposites can both be true. Model School Discipline Policy Our School is committed to discipline of children that always dignifies and respects their own true natural inner guidance and self-directed purpose for harmony, order, cooperation and love towards their environment. One of the basic tenets of Montessori education is fostering freedom and developing the power of personal choice to its fullest potential. Here are some Montessori-inspired phrases you can use when your child shows aggressive and mean behavior. You can also teach your child mindfulness exercises to help develop healthy ways to calm down and control their emotions and behavior in tough situations. Creating a balance so that our children feel close to us, but also follow rules and respect boundaries is tricky. Holding your child accountable for age appropriate actions, as well as treating them with respect will set you up for success. If you express your anger in quiet, peaceful ways, your child probably will follow your example. They havent developed the critical thinking capacity to understand the consequences of their choices. Teach Grace and Courtesy! Find ways to solve problems together Instead of bribing them to do something, we can find ways to work with them. hand." Montessori wrote, "What is generally known as discipline in traditional schools is not activity, but immobility and silence. 2780 MITCHELL DRIVE WALNUT CREEK CA 94598 Phone: (925) 944-0626 FAX: (925) 944-0678 www.springfieldmontessoriwc.com The child learns such important skills as, how to shake hands and greet a friend, how to properly interrupt someone who is busy, and how to tell someone to please move out of my way. Over time well be there to assist them to make it up to another, and they are slowly learning how to solve problems for themselves. There are certainly some Montessori classrooms that are very rigid and adult controlled, and there are also classroom that are disorderly and anything goes. Your email address will not be published. One of the best ways to teach him appropriate behavior is to control your own temper. First help them calm down. The mission of the Montessori School is to provide for the development of each child's potential based upon Dr. Montessori's insights as to the nature of the child, the role of the adult, and the need for a prepared environment. To have any meaningful discussion of these questions, it would seem that our first priority should be to define this thing called discipline. Categories Behavior and Discipline, Montessori Parenting, Home Montessori Parenting Montessori Discipline: Why Toddlers Bite and How to Make it Stop. Threats, bribes or withdrawal of privileges were expected to make us comply with our parents wishes. This is not blind obedience at all, but is a fully informed choice by a personality which has grown in freedom and developed to its fullest potential. You can find me onbloglovinandTwitter,too. However, you can use this to observe when your child is showing negative behavior. There are many times when your child's behavior warms and embraces your heart. Whether youre a teacher in a Montessori classroom or a parent looking to bring these practices home, discipline in the Montessori system can help children to grow and learn. Within this environment the child will be free to explore, but with this freedom comes responsibility. I know you dont like it when others take your toy, but I dont want you to hit and hurt anyone.. Tantrums or meltdowns are nearly inevitable with children, as they are experiencing big emotions for the first time. However, thats not to say that we need to be perfect in order to use Montessori discipline methods. I'm glad you mentioned that we should try to use positive language when discouraging our child from biting and focus on what teeth should be used for. As a toddler or preschooler, your child may lack the self-control to express anger peacefully and may naturally lash out, perhaps hitting or biting in frustration. And if all our children here from us are a bunch of instructions and directives they are not going to listen to us. This can be the most difficult part because, as parents, we often have personalities and experiences that we havent interrogated. Building a garden, teaching them simple housework tasks, and framing failures as opportunities for learning are all a part of helping your child to feel respected. If you see your child feeling agitated and aggressive while near other kids, make sure you stay near them so you can block and stop them from hitting other kids. They are always eager to take a turn playing the roles, and they are thrilled to know a better way to handle personal situations. Taking the time to help them see how their actions might affect others allows them to develop a sense of empathy, improving their desire for self-control. If it was related to a boundary, explain why that boundary exists and what would happen if they crossed that boundary. What Are The Real Benefits of Sending a Child to Montessori? Gift Guide: Best Montessori Toys for Babies 0-12 Months, Gift Guide: Best Montessori Toys for 1 Year Olds, Gift Guide: Best Montessori Toy Ideas for 18 Month Olds, Gift Guide: Best Montessori Toy Ideas for 2 Year olds, Gift Guide: Best Montessori Toy Ideas for 3 Year Olds, Gift Guide: Best Montessori Gift Ideas for Preschoolers 4 and 5 Years Old, third level of obedience as defined by the Montessori Method, is generally discouraged in the Montessori Method, parents practice the Montessori Method of discipline at home. To be consistent with the discipline used in the classroom the parenting style at home should emphasize respect for the childs feelings, choices within acceptable limits, encouragement, conflict resolution, and natural and logical consequences for behavior. Dr. Haim Ginott was mentor to the authors of the popular discipline book, 'How to Talk so Kids Will Listen'. One of the things that aroused her greatest interest was that order and discipline seemed to be so closely united that they resulted in freedom. amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "search"; Whether youre hoping to understand the philosophy a bit more, get ideas for using Montessori at home, or spend time delving into Montessori parenting tactics, there is certainly a book for you. What they see, they do. Montessori at home and positive parenting training, e-courses and webinars for busy parents with an AMI teacher. Beautiful classrooms with age appropriate Montessori learning material. Freedom and discipline walk hand in hand in Montessori pedagogy. This involves the careful preparation of the teacher and the classroom environment. If your child calms down, give them another chance to play with the other kids. Model the behaviors you want to see from your children. Worse, your child may explore other ways to get those big reactions from you. A timeout is more likely to cause resentment in the child than to encourage good behavior. Respect, then, is the basic principle of Montessori discipline. Take the time to evaluate what causes you to feel anxious or angry around your children. amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "livimontnow09-20"; The first idea that the child must acquire, in order to be actively disciplined, is that of the difference between good and evil; and the task of the educator lies in seeing that the child does not confound good with immobility, and evil with activity, as often happens in the case of the old-time discipline. Maria Montessori. Montessori Discipline At Home Parenting and discipline go together hand in hand. These sandpaper letters provide and excellent opportunity for children to learn and understand the letters beginning at a young age. Providing the vocabulary and skills to communicate their emotions is important for every toddler, but it is especially vital in correcting aggressive behavior. Take time in reading and applying the Montessori ideas and techniques. Use simple if-then logical sequences and keep your language clear and vocabulary within the childs range to ensure understanding. I cant let you hit your brother. Ask yourself: is giving the child time to think about their behavior the most effective way to understand what they have done wrong? 1. The less you feel the need to interject, the more you are able to demonstrate your trust in them and avoid a typical authoritarian role. Look for a quiet spot and practice deep breaths together or sing a calm and happy song together. Still, it is just as important that parents practice the Montessori Method of discipline at home as it is to practice it in the classroom. Youll receive some awesome freebies in the process! 6. Here are 8 tips for a Montessori approach to discipline. For example, if a child wants to eat a lot of sweets before bed, ask them, How do you feel when you eat a lot of sweets? Those who choose to have their child follow the Montessori way do so because the method guides a child to Montessori School: Is It Right For My Child? 10 Reasons Not to Hit Your Child. As said earlier, children can easily get overwhelmed by their emotions. Learning about the Montessori Method has been intriguing and fascinating, and I have enjoyed watching the little ones in my life learn and grow from incorporating Montessori elements into our family's lifestyle.Montessori For Today was started to provide answers to my own questions, which will hopefully become a great resource for others to learn about the Montessori Method, Montessori Schools, and how you can incorporate elements of Montessori into your own home and lifestyle. How Can a Real Montessori Classroom Be Identified. However, make sure you do this in a loving and respectful way. Every parents dream for their child is to grow up and become an independent adult one day. The best of the academic curriculum are useless if the child does not develop inner discipline, integrity, and respect for others and oneself. 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